Monday, September 21, 2009

Moving To The Beach

The other day, my mom was telling me about Port Aransas Texas. It's a place she and my dad (when he was still here) loved to visit when they wanted some rest and recreation. Ever since she told me about it, that poem by Edna St Vincent Millay about "I shall go back again to the bleak shore..." has been going round and round in my head.

So, I've been thinking... what if I just up and moved to Port Aransas? Then, today, I found this picture... it even says "rent me."

That is a cool looking house! Now all I have to do is find a job there, win the lottery, or ... I dunno ... find a lamp with a genie in it!

I figured where to find a magic lamp? Craig's list, of course! But, (sad face) I did not find a magic lamp. BUT guess what I did find! This listing for artists wanted:

We are preparing for our first annual fall festival here on Padre Island, and are looking for local art vendors to come join the fun!!!!! If you are interested in showcasing your art or talent please email back or call, 361-949-8041 X150 and ask for Jojo.. Interesting!! Padre Island can't be that far away!

And then there's this one in Corpus Christi: New business offering artist the chance to advertise and sale their work in a business facility. Feel free to call (688 0444) or stop by New Beginnings Wellness Spa

Maybe I wouldn't have to get a stupid job. Maybe I could sell my art! Like, for example... this painting:

Or this one:

And what about my family? How could I leave them? But never fear! I even found a job for my daughter: Barkaritaville Pet Resort is now accepting applications for Experienced Groomers. If you are interested in applying, please e-mail resume to Autumn Vasey at,

Not only that, I also found a job for my son-in-law: our company is looking to hire full and part time cleaning people (women or men) with EXPERIENCE in all aspects of cleaning ...especially in final construction cleaning...being able to use sizzor lifts,floor polishers,window cleaning etc... must have supervision and look neat in appearence ....please contact us at either or 888-514-7842 ....please leave a tel: # so that we can get back to you..asap ....ask for john.

Ok... so the jobs and the kids are taken care of, what about a social life... let me see... maybe I can find a male companion... Oh look! Here's this:

I'm still looking for the woman that's maybe a little anti-social, and possibly an outspoken misanthrope, truly "Old Fashioned", or even an intelligent shy girl who prefers not to get caught up in the trappings of the shallow, greedy masses. Seriously people in general are stupid and mostly annoying and I don't have the patience or desire to waste my time sorting through them. Despite what it may sound like I tend to give everybody a chance to fuck up atleast once. I'm only judging society in general, of course there are decent people out there.. Ok here it goes..

I'd like you to be Agnostic, Atheists annoy me almost as much as devout Christians do. Hindu, or Buddhists are ok too if you're not just pretending. Looks aren't that important either, I don't mind a bbw or a bean pole or anything in between. There's beauty to be found in every woman if you know how to look. I like to read the book before giving my critique... I want someone real to enjoy life with, someone I know right off the bat isn't gonna burn me, and that hasn't gone retarded over some completely unimportant contrived issue, societal crutch, or lame fad. An old soul. I want a woman who would be comfortable going "ex-pat" and living on a farm in South or Central America (Costa Rica :D) with me. A woman who can carry on an intelligent conversation that isn't about how "fly" or "bangin" she is but can also shut the fuck up when we're sitting on the beach watching the sunset and be comfortable just soaking in the moment. A passionate, animal loving, deeply sensitive woman.

First of all I don't care about fitting in.. I smoke cigarettes, I drink alcohol, I enjoy everything in excess. I'm a little impulsive. I like the outdoors, one because I like being isolated, and two I enjoy our Mother Earth's company. I'm an accomplished gardener. I devour astronomy. I like semi-religious psychedelic experiences, but I don't smoke pot (as much as I used to). I love to learn, a day that's gone by without learning something is a day wasted. I'm not wealthy, I don't need to be, but I do take care of my family. That doesn't mean kids I don't have any, YET... I love to cook, I'm a BBQ wizard. I spent quite a few years working in a kitchen under a French chef when I was a kid. I've been driving a truck for the last 5 years because it affords me some independance of mind and thought. What I'd really like to do is just be completely self sufficient. That's where the farm in comes in.. I'm not a fucking "metro-sexual" I pride my self on having rough hands and sore back at the end of the day. I'm not a complainer, and yes I can reconcile that after everything I've just said. I just feel what I feel. On the outside I'm 6'1", wide shoulders, blue eyes, short brown hair that's starting to pepper a little bit, and I'm not skinny, I'm not obese but I'm definitely not skinny.. 250lbs. Yes I'm working on it. I have a few tattoos and I'd like a few more..

Ok so there should be no confusion as to who I am, or what I want. I'm very real and very serious. It's Monday and the sun is back out today. My garden got some much needed rain.

Honestly I don't expect a real reply I don't think what I want exists, at least not here in Corpus where being ignorant is synonymous with cool, but if you do reply please be honest, I do have face pics. I will not send you a picture of my junk and ask for some "nsa".

P.S. Nipple piercings are a deal breaker lol.. And seriously if your favorite music is Rap and only Rap I want nothing at all to do with you. Same goes for most C&W.. Don't get me wrong I like all types of music if it's somewhat intelligent, but I find the desire to be "Ghetto", or "Right-Wing" both equally disturbing. PostingID: 1374519691

So, what do you think? Does he look like this?


Or this?

And, really, does it matter? After all, looks aren't EVERYTHING!
So, now that that's all settled, all I need is a really big truck!

Well... maybe not THAT big. Something like this might do just fine! I especially like that it comes with so many helpers!

And then... I suppose... I'd be happy! Don't you think? How do you like my happy smiling face?

And if you actually read this whole entire post... WOW! Wanna go with me?

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1 Comment:

Anonymous said...

A road trip is just what you need sometimes. That magical search for the American Dream...

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